Welcome to the humble abode of Finley the Prophet, a sage and wise seer who shall guide you through the treacherous waters of your existential crisis.

"The only thing that keeps me going is the thought of a never-ending supply of free pizza." - Finley the Prophet

Step 1: Acknowledge Your Despair

• Realize Your Mortality
• Identify Your Fears
• Understand the Futility of Human Existence

"The meaning of life is 42, but the meaning of my next sandwich is 'turkey and cheese'." - Finley the Prophet

And so, dear seeker, it begins.