Prophets and Fortune Telling FAQ - A Guide to Navigating the Uncertain Seas of Destiny

Q: What is the purpose of this website?

Our purpose is to provide the most unpredictable, the most enigmatic, and the most utterly useless predictions in the realm of the known and unknown.

Q: How do I become a certified Prophet of the Oracle?Q: Can I trust the predictions?

Trust us, or don't. We're not really sure either. But hey, it's not like it's going to affect the trajectory of your life or anything.

Q: Can I request specific predictions for my life events?

We'll try, but no promises. Our crystal ball is a bit... cloudy. Try asking the Oracle of the Unknown, but be prepared for some existential dread.

Q: Can I pay for premium services?

Ha! You think you can buy your way to clarity? Think again, friend. Our services are free, because who needs actual accuracy, am I right?

Q: Is there a support team to help with my questions?

Our support team consists of an intern who's really only here for the free coffee machine.

Q: Can I get a refund if I don't like the predictions?

Refunds? Ha! You'll just have to live with the existential dread of not knowing your future. That's on you.

Subscribe to our newsletter for more questions than answers!

Consult the Oracle of the Unknown for more uncertainty!

© 2023 The Oracle of Unreliable Predictions. All rights reserved. Or not.