The Sock Puppet Prophets of the Future

The Prophecies of the Sock Puppet Prophets are a group of esteemed individuals known for their uncanny ability to predict the most mundane events in the most outlandish ways. They're like the weather forecasters of the mundane, but for socks.

Here's a list of our most recent prophecies:

• Prophecy 456: "I foresee a 37% chance of scattered thunderstorms and forgotten socks under the bed."
• Prophecy 789: "Beware, for I predict that the cat will knock over the next vase on the third Thursday of next month."
• Prophecy 321: "I prophesy a 99.9% chance of the microwave will start making a strange whirring noise, which will be a harbinger of the apocalypse."

Want to know more about our methods? Check out:

• Prophecy Methodologies - Where we reveal the secrets of our crystal balls and tarot cards.
• A History of Prophecy - A comprehensive look at the history of the Sock Puppet Prophets, from our humble beginnings to our current reign as the most renowned prophecy-purveyors in the land.