In the year 3000, humanity finally cracked the code on time travel. But not just time travel, mind you. We're talking about space-time dilation – the art of making the fabric of reality bend to your will.
The first recorded attempt at space-time dilation was made by our esteemed colleague, Dr. Chronos. He traveled back in time to the age of dinosaurs and returned with a souvenir t-shirt that read "T-Rex Fan Club" in bold, glittery letters.
We also have a special report on the effects of space-time dilation on the human brain. It turns out, the experience is quite similar to being in a never-ending meeting with your in-laws.
For more on this fascinating topic, visit our Symptoms of Timey Travel Disorder section.