In this groundbreaking study, researchers have attempted to quantify the futility of scheduling.
Using an innovative combination of graph paper, highlighters, and existential dread, the team measured the average human attention span to be exactly 2.5 seconds.
They also calculated that the average person spends 4.2 minutes per day scrolling through social media, 2.1 minutes per day playing Solitaire, and 1.9 minutes per day contemplating the meaninglessness of life.
When asked for comment, Dr. Jane, lead researcher, quipped, "We've discovered that humans are 99.9% more interested in cat videos than they are in sticking to schedules."
What happens when people actually follow schedules?