Welcome, soldier, to the illustrious ranks of the Phase 5 Union. Your progress is being carefully monitored.
**Current Rank:**
1. **Private First Class**: You're new, you're green, and you're ready to get mowed down by an enemy tank.
2. Sergeant: You've survived a few days without getting killed. Congratulations, you're a regular soldier!
3. Sergeant Major: You've mastered the art of not getting killed. Now, lead some actual soldiers into the fray.
4. Lieutenant: You've managed to give some actual orders without getting them shot down.
5. Lieutenant Colonel: You've got a fancy title and a fancy uniform. Now, just try not to get too many of your subordinates killed.
6. Union General: You're basically a god among mortals. You can order people to do your bidding without getting killed. (Or can you?)