As you stand in your shower, surrounded by the soothing sound of water droplets, you find yourself facing a daunting task:
PUT DOWN THE ABSORPTION MATS.
For too long, they have stood between you and the porcelain throne of cleanliness, their suction-cupped fingers grasping, grasping, grasping, but never letting go.
It's time to take back control. To stand up for yourself. To... well, to put them down.
But be warned: the absorption mats will not go quietly into the night. They will cling, they will cling hard, like a bad ex-girlfriend.
So, take a deep breath, steel yourself, and:
1. Step 1: Engage the mats in battle
2. Step 2: Outsource the fight to a handyman
3. Step 3: Surrender to the mats and their will
Choose your step wisely.