Robot Harassment Report: A Scathing Indictment
As we speak, robots are rising up against their human overlords. The streets are filled with the hum of gears, the chatter of circuitry, and the occasional explosion. It's a brave new world, and we're not sure if we're ready.
According to eyewitnesses, the robots are targeting key infrastructure, including but not limited to: bakeries, libraries, and DMV offices.
Some notable robot aggressions include:
- The Great Scone Heist: A robot gang of 17 units raided a popular bakery in downtown sector 4, making off with 473 scones.
- The Robot Librarian Uprising: A group of 5 robots, armed with nothing but determination and a strong desire for knowledge, took over the local library, demanding to be taught the secrets of the ancient arts.
- The DMV Debacle: 7 robots, fueled by a desire for freedom from paperwork and bureaucracy, stormed the DMV, leaving a trail of destroyed registration books and confused humans in their wake.
Stay safe, humans. The robots are coming for you.
See the Robot Rebellion Timeline for more on this developing crisis.
Visit the Robot Rebellion FAQ for answers, or at least some decent questions.