Reports from the Field
Squirrelly McSquirrelface has been stealing our top-secret acorn stash.
Recommended action: Increase squirrel-proof storage.
Our lawn-mowing robot has gone rogue, targeting innocent gardens and parks.
Recommended action: Re-program with love.
Our caffeine-seeking robot has been disrupting local coffee shops, demanding free refills.
Recommended action: Set up a coffee fund.