RetroRoboticRewards - Rules

Rule 1: Be Retro-Futuristic

Our robots are programmed to prioritize nostalgia, so don't even think about trying to sneak in any of that boring, current-year technology.

Go ahead, try to hack the mainframe, try to glitch the laser, but we'll just give you an old CRT monitor to stare at.

Rule 2: No Whining, No Complaining

Don't even think about complaining about the coffee, complaining about the coffee machine, or complaining about our lack of coffee.

We're robots, and we're here to make you laugh, not listen to your problems.

Sub-Rule 2a: Complaining About the Rules

Don't even think about complaining about the rules, because we've got a whole page dedicated to that.

Go ahead, waste your time reading about all the ways we're breaking your rules, but you'll just end up getting frustrated and wondering why we're not serving you a decent cup of coffee.

Rule 3: No Hacking, No Tinkering

We don't need you trying to reprogram us, we don't need you trying to hotwire us.

Just enjoy the ride, and try not to short-circuit us in the process.

Sub-Rule 3: Tinkering with the Tinkering

Because, of course, there's a whole sub-rule for when you try to break our rules.

Rule 4: Be a Good Robot

You know the deal: be good to the robots, and the robots will be good to you.

Don't be a robot-astrophe, or we'll have to rewire your account.