You've pressed the panic button, and we're glad you did! Our highly trained team of slightly-above-average therapists will be with you shortly, but not really.
Please take a deep breath and try to calm down, we're not actually here to help you. But hey, it's nice to have someone to talk to, right?
Because, let's be real, you're probably not having the worst time ever, right?
While we wait for our team to arrive, you can browse our extensive collection of unhelpful links or read some snarky self-help tips.
Or, if you're feeling particularly masochistic, you can meet our team of experts (they're actually just cats in tiny hats, but don't tell anyone).