The Panic Button: Technique 1

When things get hairy, reach for the panic button.

  • Step 1: Press the panic button. It's like a big red button, usually labeled "PANIC" or "ABANDON ALL HOPE".

  • Step 2: Hold on for dear life. The button might be stuck, so you'll have to wrestle with it a bit.

  • Step 3: Repeat as necessary. If the first attempt doesn't work, don't worry! Just press it again and again until something breaks.

  • Alternative Technique 1: Just pretend you're a 90s hacker and yell "I'M A LITTLE TEENAGE RUNAWAY!" while frantically pressing the panic button.

  • Learn more panic button techniques!

  • Disclaimer: The panic button is not actually a real safety feature.

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