Q1: -12% from last year's already lackluster numbers. We're starting to think the world is actually just really bad at making money.
Q2: -8% from last year's Q2. At this rate, we'll be giving away products for free by the end of the year.
Q3: -5% from last year's Q3. We're starting to get worried that our investors are just not seeing the vision.
Q4: +2% from last year's Q4. We're calling it a "miracle recovery" and pretending we didn't just sell a bunch of discounted holiday decorations.
Our CEO was forced to eat a whole can of beans for lunch three days in a row. That's gotta be a first, right?
The company's coffee machine broke down, and we were forced to use a broken vending machine that just dispensed stale air. Good times.
We accidentally ordered 10,000 units of the wrong product by accident. Now we're stuck with a warehouse full of useless widgets.
Q1 2021: We're hoping to break even with our own sales numbers. Fingers crossed.