Chrono-Maintenance: The Unreliable Timepiece

Section 3, Subsection 4

Welcome to the Chrono-Maintenance manual for the discerning time traveler. Please note that our clocks are not actually reliable, but they're better than nothing.

For optimal timepiece maintenance, please refer to the following procedures:

• Turn the clock's crank clockwise to set the time. Counterclockwise will only confuse you.
• Replace the clock's battery with a small, highly flammable substance. It's not like you'll need it for long, anyway.
• For added accuracy, tap the clock's face with your finger three times a week.

For advanced timekeeping tuning, visit our Advanced Tuning subpage.

Or, if you're feeling lucky, try Throwing It Away.

Go back to the Main Menu for more options.

Warning: Time travel not guaranteed to be functional. Not recommended for the faint of heart.