To our valued employees,
I, the CEO, am writing to inform you that the recent surge in self-portrait toaster sales has left us with an existential crisis. Are we toasters of self-worth, or are we merely vessels of self-admiration?
In light of this, we've decided to pivot our business model to cater to the emerging trend of self-portrait toaster art installations. We're looking for volunteers to help us brainstorm the perfect toaster-adjacent coffee shop experience!
Click here to submit your ideas and join the revolution!
Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, try your hand at our in-house secret lab, where we're experimenting with the world's first-ever self-portrait toaster that also makes a mean latte.