EMERGENCY SHUTDOWN PROCEDURE

WARNING: SYSTEM FAILURE IMMINENT!

Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, attempt to shut down the toaster using the manual override switch. This will result in a 50% chance of toaster malfunction, 20% chance of toaster explosion, and a 30% chance of toaster-induced existential crisis.

**WARNING: TOASTER SELF-DESTRUCTION IMMINENT!

Instead, follow these steps:

prophets-of-toaster-lore/ancient-toaster-myths/
  1. Disconnect from power source
  2. Remove all bread
  3. Perform 5 minutes of deep breathing exercises
  4. Call the Toaster Emergency Hotline at 1-800-TOAST-911

Remember, a toaster in crisis is a toaster in chaos.

Thermal Overload Procedure Toaster Repairs and Replacements

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