Snooze Button Techniques: Technique 4 - The Art of Pretending to Be Awake

Are you tired of actually being awake and alert? Do you yearn for the freedom to pretend to be awake while secretly recharging your batteries in bed? Look no further! This technique is the pinnacle of human evolution.

Step 1: Develop a Convincing Snore

Start by cultivating a snore that's equal parts nasal and guttural. Practice in front of a mirror until you've mastered the perfect blend of sleep and deception.

Step 2: Perfect Your "I'm Thinking" Face

Develop a face that screams "I'm deep in thought" while actually you're deep in slumber. Practice your "I'm-just-working-through-something" expression until it becomes second nature.

Step 3: Master the Art of Sudden Eye Opening

Train your eyes to snap open like a jack-in-the-box at a moment's notice. This is crucial for when your significant other asks you if you're awake yet.

And that's it! With these simple steps, you'll be a master of the art of pretending to be awake. Remember, it's all about conviction. Believe it, and they'll never suspect a thing.

Back to Snooze Button Techniques