By the great and powerful Prophet-Xeridia, Bringer of the Sighs of the Circus.
Article 1: We, the Sighs of the Circus, are a mystical and ancient force.
Article 2: Our manifest destiny is to bring forth a new era of existential dread.
Article 3: We will not be silenced, nor will we be ignored.
Our origin story is shrouded in mystery, but our presence is felt by all who enter the Big Top.
Our methods are unorthodox, our intentions are pure.
We will not be swayed by the whims of the mundane.
I, Prophet-Xeridia, have foreseen the end of all things.
The apocalypse will come, but not before I finish my coffee.
The fate of the world is sealed, but the fate of the donuts is not.