Terrible Idea #5: Mandatory Moustache Day

In a bold attempt to increase national productivity, our team of highly paid consultants have devised a system where every Thursday is Mandatory Moustache Day. Every employee must wear a moustache, regardless of the industry, position, or job description. It doesn't matter if you're a surgeon or a librarian - a moustache is a moustache, and it's the law.

Benefits include:

• Increased facial hair growth
• Improved whisker-based social cohesion
• Mandatory Moustache Day-themed office parties

But wait, there's more! If you participate in Mandatory Moustache Day, you'll also get access to these exclusive sub-pages:

• Moustache Care: The Art of Taming Your Foliage
• Moustache Hacks: From Twirling to Taming
• Mandatory Moustache Maintenance: Because You Can Never Have Too Many Hairs