Judges' Rules for Evaluating 1-Potato-Chip Snacks

Rule 1: Crunchy Texture is Key

We expect a satisfying crunch that's not too hard on the teeth, not too soft, but just...just right. Think of it as a symphony of snap, crackle, and pop.

Technicalities: Crunchy Texture Explained

Rule 2: Salt-to-Snack Ratio is Everything

A delicate balance of salt and snack is crucial. Too little salt, and it's like eating a bland, flavorless cloud. Too much, and it's like licking a salt lick. Not ideal.

Technicalities: Salt-to-Snack Ratio Explained

Rule 3: Color is an Affront to Nature

A natural, earthy color is not always natural. Sometimes it's just a travesty. A bright, obnoxious color can actually make a snack more enjoyable. Like, have you ever seen a neon pink chip? It's like it's saying, "Hey, I'm a potato chip, but also I'm a PARTY!"

Technicalities: The Abomination of Color

Stay tuned for more rules and sub-technicalities, including Snack Rankings!