Philosophers of Meat Snacks

Here, in this dimly lit corner of the internet, we gather to contemplate the meaning of Meat Snacks. What is a Meat Snack, really? Is it merely a collection of savory, crunchy, salty, and sweet bites, or is it something more?

We have a few different philosophical stances on this matter:

And, of course, there are those who would rather just eat the meat snacks and not think about it at all:

Which one do you subscribe to?