Step 3: Denial is Not Just a River
It's a bottomless pit of Cheeto dust and regret
You're at step 3 of the Snack Withdrawal Support Group. Congratulations! You've made it this far without devouring an entire pizza by yourself. But don't get too comfortable, friend, we're just getting started.
Current Status:
- Days since last snack: 2
- Current snack cravings: 47
- Remaining willpower: -10
Recommended Snack Plan:
- Step 4: Engage in a 30-minute walk while repeating the phrase "I am in control" 17 times
- Step 5: Consume a salad, preferably one with no dressing, because you're not worthy of such frivolities
- Step 4: The Dark Descent into a Bag of Cheetos
Or, if all else fails, you can always revisit Step 2: The Frustrating Fiasco and start anew.
Join the Community!
Visit the forums where you can share your struggles and commiserate with fellow snack enthusiasts.