The Bob Smith Sock Folding Method

Warning: Do not attempt to fold your socks using the Bob Smith Sock Folding Method unless you are a highly trained, highly caffeinated professional.

Bob Smith, renowned sock folding expert and local legend, has graciously shared his patented technique with us. But be warned: this method is NOT for the faint of heart.

The Method:

1. Start by sorting your socks into piles based on their color, pattern, and level of desperation.
2. Next, locate the largest, most intimidating sock in each pile and fold it into a perfect rectangle.
3. Place the folded sock on the floor, and using a combination of brute force and prayer, force it into submission.
4. Rinse the sock with a gentle stream of coffee, and then fold it into a perfect square.
5. Repeat steps 2-4 until all socks have been folded and your laundry room resembles a war zone.

For more advanced techniques, including the Mountain Fold and the Laundry Folding Ninja, visit our Advanced Techniques page.

Side Effects:

• Exhaustion
• Discoloration of fingers
• Loss of sanity
• Increased coffee consumption

Precautions:

• Do not attempt to fold socks with a hangover.
• Do not attempt to fold socks with a toddler.
• Do not attempt to fold socks with a sense of humor.