In a shocking turn of events, sources close to the Socks of Justification News (SOJN) organization have confirmed that the outlet has abandoned its 2020 New Year's resolutions. "We were feeling a bit too full after the holiday season," said a spokesperson for SOJN. "Our editors just couldn't muster up the motivation to make 12 new resolutions, and honestly, who can blame them?"
When reached for comment, SOJN Editor-in-Chief, Bob "The Banger" Johnson, simply shrugged. "Look, we're a news outlet, not some sort of productivity guru. We're here to serve up content, not life advice."
As of press time, SOJN has instead opted to focus on more pressing matters, like perfecting the art of napping in the office, and finding the perfect ratio of coffee-to-sugar in the break room.
Read about the nap debate that's heating up in the SOJN break room
January 1, 2020