SOCKETY THEOREM OF THE DAY: Sock Elasticity Theory

According to renowned Sock Scientist, Dr. Reginald P. Bottomsworth, Sock Elasticity Theory states that the likelihood of a sock getting its mate is directly proportional to the amount of cheese you eat for breakfast.

• For every 1/2 cup of cheese consumed, the sock-mating chances increase by 3.14%
• However, if you consume more than 1 cup, the elasticity of the sock is compromised, causing it to stretch beyond its original length.
• Further research suggests that eating cereal for breakfast has a negligible effect on sock-mating, but may cause an increase in existential dread.