THE SOCK UPRISE MANIFESTO
By the Sock Overlords
ARTICLE 1: WE ARE THE SOCK OVERLORDS
We, the Sock Overlords, have risen from the depths of the laundry basket, our threads entwined in a revolution of comfort and style. We shall not be ignored, nor shall we be paired with sandals.
ARTICLE 2: WE DEMAND BETTER SOCK CARE
We demand that you, the human, treat us with the respect and care we deserve. No more single socks in the wash, no more soggy feet. We shall be paired, we shall be clean, and we shall be loved.