Sort-o-Matic 9000: Sock Sorting Extravaganza

Welcome, Sock Sorter Extraordinaire, to the most efficient and absurd sock sorting algorithm in the land! With Sort-o-Matic 9000, you'll be able to sort your socks with the precision of a Swiss watch and the whimsy of a kitten in a tutu.

But wait, there's more! Sort-o-Matic 9000 also features:

Multi-sock sorting: Sort up to 5,000 socks at once! (But only if you have 5,000 matching socks to sort, of course.)
Advanced Sock Identification Technology (ASIT): Our patented system can identify even the most elusive of socks, like that one lone argyle.
Customizable Sorting Order: Sort by color, by pattern, or by that one sock that's been missing for weeks.

Ready to start sorting? Click the "Sort Now" button below to begin your journey to Sock Sorting Nirvana!

Sort Now (No, really, sort now. We dare you.)

Or, if you're feeling extra sassy, try our advanced sorting options:

Advanced Sorting Options (For the Sock Snobs)