Step 5: Justify Your Existence
Because Procrastination is a Viable Life Choice
You've made it to step 5 of this rigorous, scientifically-designed program. Congratulations! Now it's time to confront the most pressing question of our existence: why are you still here?
Methods:
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Justifying by Accident
Where you pretend you meant to do this all along.
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Justifying by Nature
Where the laws of physics and the futility of human effort are your only guides.
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Justifying by Obscurity
Where the meaning of life is hidden behind an impenetrable veil of confusing, unrelated concepts.