Striped Teal Socks: The Ultimate Fashion Statement

Warning: These socks are so bold, they'll make you a target for sneaky squirrels.

Features:

• 100% cotton for maximum comfort (and maximum itchiness)

• Striped pattern that'll make you the envy of all your friends (and possibly some strangers)

• Guaranteed to make you walk into at least one doorframe

• May require frequent sock rotation due to excessive wear

More Socks of Desperation Accessories to Match

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Time remaining before your eyes bleed from excessive sock gazing:

60 minutes