For when your socks get too close for comfort

Section 1: Sock Separation Protocols

The following procedures are mandatory for maintaining a safe and hygienic sock environment.

• Ensure that all socks are separated from one another at all times.
• Use a minimum of 4 socks per foot at all times.
• Maintain a minimum of 6 inches between each sock to prevent toe-touching.

Remember: a safe sock is a separate sock.

Section 2: Sock Emergency Response

In the event of a sock emergency, follow these steps:

• Call the Sock Emergency Hotline at 1-800-SOCK-911.
• Evacuate the area, taking all non-essential socks with you.
• Put on a spare set of socks to protect your feet from further harm.

Don't forget to bring a snack, because emergencies are hungry work.