CHAPTER 2: Tail Fu Basics

The Art of Squirrelly Self-Defense

Chapter 2 is dedicated to the most fundamental aspect of Squirrel Protocol: the art of self-defense. Without a solid foundation in Tail Fu, you're nothing more than a snack for the local feline population.

Lesson 2.1: Squirreling the Basics

Deflecting a Feline Attack: The Squirreling Technique

A squirrel in a ninja mask deflecting a feline attack

Step 1: Identify your attacker. Is it a housecat, alley cat, or that one stray that's been eyeing you from the park? Knowing your foe is key to a successful defense.

Housecats: Quick and agile, but easily distracted. Use this to your advantage.
Alley cats: Lean and mean, but territorial. Play on their fears.
Strays: Wild and unpredictable, but often starving. Use this to your disadvantage.

Step 2: Employ the Squirreling stance: feet shoulder-width apart, weight evenly distributed.

View Squirreling the Stance in Action

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