Ancient Prophets: The Originals

A Collection of Wise and Mostly-Reliable Messengers

Lost Prophets of the Flood Prophetic Puns

Our Prophets

• Zeus Tells It Like It Is
• Kratos the Krampus
• Oracle of the Ancient Spheres

FAQs

• Do our prophets actually know what they're talking about? No.
• Are they reliable? Only 90% of the time.
• Do we have a refund policy? Ha! You think we're made of money?

Subcommittees

• Lost Prophets of the Flood
• Prophetic Puns

Contact Us

Send us an email, but only if you're prepared for disappointment.

email: prophets@ancientprophets.org