Submandate: Requirements

Section 2: Requirements

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Requirement 1: Must Wear a Name Tag

You must wear a name tag at all times. Failure to comply will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:

Being forced to watch an endless loop of elevator music
Having to attend meetings about meetings
Being assigned a team of robotic coworkers

Learn more about the consequences of non-compliance

Requirement 2: Use Only Official Socks

You will be issued a pair of official socks upon arrival. Failure to wear the official socks will result in:

Forced viewing of a PowerPoint presentation about the importance of socks
Being forced to participate in a company-wide sock-pairing ceremony

Learn more about the sock policy

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