By order of the Intergalactic Council of Bureaucrats, we are pleased to announce that our new policy will be implemented forthwith.
Or at least, we're pretty sure that's what we said. Our lawyers are still on the phone with our interns.
As of now, all new hires will receive a free lunch on Fridays, but only if they wear their best "I'm a functioning member of society" tie.
Don't forget, this mandate is subject to change at any moment, so don't bother printing out the memo. Just use your phone.
For more information, visit:
(Or just don't, we're really not sure how this whole thing is going to work out)