Section 3: Brochures for the Sane

Here is where we store all the things you need to know to survive in our post-apocalyptic world, or just for fun. Browse our brochures and find out!

Submandate 1: The Art of Proper Hand Washing

Proper hand washing is not just about cleanliness, it's about survival. Learn the proper technique, and maybe you'll live long enough to see the world end in flames.

Learn more about the proper hand washing technique.

Submandate 2: The Best Ways to Use Your Fleece Jacket as a Deflector Shield

It's not as crazy as it sounds. With a little bit of creativity, your fleece jacket can deflect an arrow at 20 paces. Don't believe us? Read on!

Find out more about the deflector shield technique.

Submandate 3: The Proper Use of Your Beard as a Lure

Don't get caught in the wild, get caught on camera! Learn the art of using your majestic beard as a lure to attract the attention of any passing velociraptor.

Discover how to grow the perfect beard for luring.

And that's just the beginning! There's more brochures to come, so stay tuned!

Back to all submandates.