Missing Utensils: The Unmitigated Disaster

Because you can't even be bothered to do laundry, you've managed to lose all your utensils.

It's not just a few missing forks, it's a full-blown crisis. You're down to one spoon, and it's in the dishwasher.

Don't even get us started on the state of your kitchen.

Here's a list of the utensils you've lost:

Do you have any leads on the missing utensils? Or would you like to open an investigation?