Rule 1: Socks are Optional

Unless it's Tuesday, then wear socks.

As a renowned expert in Sockology, Socky Paterson has decreed that the donning of socks is a matter of personal preference, unless it's Tuesday. On Tuesdays, it's mandatory to wear socks. Don't ask questions.

For more on the intricacies of Sockology, visit our Socky Says section.

Or, if you're feeling particularly adventurous, try Sock Hockey for the most extreme Socky Paterson experience.

Rule 2: Puns are Mandatory

Every time you speak, a pun shall be made. No exceptions, no excuses.

For more on the importance of Puns, visit our Pun-ishments section.

Or, if you're feeling particularly punny, try Pun-ishment Hall of Fame for the most epic collection of puns.

Rule 3: Socky Paterson's Rules are Non-Negotiable

Don't even think about trying to break the rules. We have lawyers.

For more on the consequences of rule-breaking, visit our Socky Paterson Lawyers section.

Or, if you're feeling particularly rebellious, try Rebel Within for the most extreme Socky Paterson experience.