Toaster Coffee Recipe

Warning: Do Not Attempt to Use a Real Toaster to Make Coffee, You'll Ruin it
Ingredients:

1/2 cup Toaster Water (tap water will not do)

1/2 cup Toaster Oil (you can use the stuff that's been sitting in the garage for 20 years)

1/4 cup Toaster Coffee Grounds (don't even think about using regular coffee grounds)

1 Toaster Element (the glowing red part that's supposed to toast bread)

Preheat Toaster to 400 degrees Fahrenheit (don't ask why, just do it)
Pour Toaster Water into Toaster Water Reservoir (it's a real thing)
Add Toaster Oil and Toaster Coffee Grounds to Toaster Water Reservoir (stir counterclockwise)
Place Toaster Element on top of Toaster Coffee Mixture (don't touch it, it's hot)
Wait for 5 minutes, then serve in a Toaster-Resistant Cup

Side effects may include: toaster fire, toaster explosion, and spontaneous combustion of the kitchen cat.