When someone says, 'I'm not a morning person.'

• I'm not a night person, either.
• But I'm a 'I'll-never-get-up' person.
• And I'm a 'I'll-just-stay-in-bed' person.

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When someone says, 'I'm not a morning person, but I'm a night person.'

• That's not a valid answer, it's like saying 'I'm not a cat, but I'm a dog.'
• I'm a cat, but I'm a dog. (Just kidding, that doesn't make sense.)

Both Sides of the Isaac Newton Problem »

When someone says, 'I'm not a morning person, I'm a vampire.'

• Vampires don't exist, unless they're from a certain neighborhood.
• Then they're just a real estate agent.

Vampire Real Estate »