The Cotton Ball Method: When You're Desperate, But Don't Want to Pay for a Doctor

Cautiously insert a cotton ball into your ear canal while simultaneously reciting the entirety of "The Wheels on the Bus" in a soothing voice. This method has a 99.9% chance of dislodging earwax, but a 100% chance of dislodging your dignity.

Cotton Ball Method: Because who needs a doctor, anyway?

Side effects may include:

Excessive earwax buildup due to repeated use
Uncontrollable singing of "The Wheels on the Bus"
Loss of friends due to your bizarre behavior