Epigenetics: the science of not being a genetic idiot. It's like the difference between being a parent and being a responsible adult human being. You see, your genes are like your parents, they're the ones who made you into a slob, but epigenetics is like the friend who tells you to put down the donut.
With Epigenetics For Dummies, you'll learn to ignore your genes and become the person you always wanted to be: a functioning member of society. It's like a genetic reboot, but without the rebooting. You'll be saying, "I'm not my genes, I'm me," but really you're just your genes with better choices.
But don't worry, it's not all fun and games. Epigenetics is hard work. You'll have to put down the donut. And the remote control. And your video games. And maybe even your cat. But trust us, it's worth it. You'll be the envy of all your friends. "I'm not my genes, I'm me," and they'll be like, "Wow, you're not your genes, you're actually a functioning human being."
So, what are you waiting for? Get epigenetic today! (But don't forget to put down the donut.)
Hyperlinks:
Epigenetics For Self-Improvement Pricing - because you want to know how much this will cost you.
Epigenetics Success Stories: We've Got People Who Used To Be Idiots, Now They're Not - because who doesn't love a good success story?
Epigenetics For Beginners: Because Your Genes Won't Help - for the clueless.