Excessive Caffeine Consumption: A Tale of Addiction

Warning: You Have Been Identified as a Caffeine Addict

Congratulations! You have reached the peak of caffeine-fueled despair. Your body is now a vessel for the stimulant-fueled chaos that is your life. You have been warned:

• Your heart beats like a jackhammer

• Your hands shake like a leaf

• Your eyes dart back and forth like a hyperactive hamster

• You have forgotten what it's like to sleep more than 4 hours a night

• You have mastered the art of downing an entire pot of coffee in under 10 minutes

Don't worry, it's not the end. Yet. But seriously, take it easy, human.

Get Help

Or, if you're feeling adventurous, try:

Drink Soda to Feel Better

Side effects may include:

Don't say we didn't warn you.

Or, if you want to try a different route:

Drink Just Enough Caffeine