Q: What is Flamingo-Disasters?
A: Flamingo-Disasters is a mysterious phenomenon where a flamingo's perfectly good looks are suddenly and inexplicably ruined by a single, unfortunate incident.
What is the deal with Florence the Flamingo?
Why do they always happen to us?
How many Flamingos have been affected?
What do we do when it happens?
Q: Are Flamingo-Disasters contagious?
A: We're not entirely sure, but we're working on it.
Q: Can I get a refund?
A: Ha! You didn't pay anything, you're just a concerned citizen.