Method 2: The Sauce is Loose

Our top-secret method involves a delicate balance of mayonnaise, ketchup, and a pinch of existential dread.

This is a highly guarded process, but we're willing to share it with you. Sort of.

Here's a step-by-step guide:

1. Acquire a bottle of mayonnaise that's been sitting in the pantry for exactly 37 years.
2. Stir in a dash of ketchup that's been frozen in a block of ice for 14 years.
3. Conduct an emergency meeting with the CEO to discuss the importance of using locally sourced ingredients.
4. Mash the mixture with a spoon while contemplating the meaninglessness of existence.

And that's it. That's all we can reveal.

Want to know our other top-secret methods? Try these:

• Method 1: The Saucy McSaucface
• Method 3: The Saucy McSaunders