Exemptions In Perpetuity

Because you can never really be free from the shackles of love and affection, we've established a new system to deal with this eternal conundrum.

Exemptions In Perpetuity is here to provide you with the tools and support you need to navigate the complexities of forever-and-a-day commitments.

Below, you'll find our list of services, each designed to help you cope with the crushing weight of perpetual attachment.

Services

• Emotional Amnesia - Our patented procedure to remove unwanted feelings from your brain, temporarily.
• Forever Lunches - Because sometimes, you just need to eat a meal together, forever.
• Infinite Texts - Send an infinite number of 'just checking in' texts to your loved one, without the burden of actually having to think.

Or, if you'd rather just give up, try our

Perpetual Surrender - Our expertly crafted program to help you admit defeat, once and for all.