Granny's Wisdom of the Ages is here!
You've come to seek my counsel, have you?
Well, I've got a whole lot of it, and I'm willing to share.
But first, let me tell you, I've got a few rules:

• Don't even think about asking for cookies.
• Don't even think about asking for cookies.
• Don't even think about asking for cookies, I said!

Now, what's on your mind?
You want to know about the secret to life?
Or perhaps you're seeking advice on how to make the perfect grilled cheese sandwich?
Or maybe you just want to know what to wear to the next big dance party?
Let's get this over with, shall we?