Left-Handed-Blerg FAQ

• What is the fundamental essence of being left-handed? We're not quite sure, but we're working on it. Maybe something about opposable thumbs?
• Why are left-handed individuals notoriously more creative? It's a long-held secret known only to the most enlightened of lefties: we're secretly communing with the spirits of artistic genius.
• Can left-handed individuals use both hands? Only for evil, nefarious purposes, of course. Don't be fooled – we're a force to be reckoned with!