INCONSISTENT SOCKS ARE A THREAT
Warning: Inconsistent socks may cause:
- Existential dread
- Unpredictable blisters
- Unrelenting anxiety
Causes:
- Pairing them with non-matching mates
- Wearing them with mismatched shoes
- Not ironing them
Symptoms:
- Uncomfortable footwear
- Discoloration of surrounding clothing
- Increased risk of social ostracism
Diagnosis:
- Consult with a professional sock therapist
- Take a sock inventory
- Consider a sock detox program
Remedies:
- Sort and categorize your socks
- Buy new socks with matching mates
- Learn to iron
Don't let the sockpocalypse happen to you!
Join the Sock Anonymous Support Group