Custom Cupid Idols High End Lasso Specifications
The finest, most extravagant, and most overpriced love lasso specifications, carefully crafted for the discerning customer.
- Material: 100% pure, Grade-A, artisanal heartstrings
- Length: Adjustable, but only up to 100 meters, darling
- Diameter: As wide as your love can handle
Optional upgrades:
- Laser-engraved with your ex's phone number (extra $200)
- Hand-woven with a rare, vintage fabric of love
Tech Specs:
Our love lassos come with:
- A built-in, high-amp, heart-rate sensor
- A GPS tracking device that pinpoints the exact location of your loved one's heart
- A built-in, AI-powered, sappy love poem generator
Order now and receive a complimentary, personalized love letter, written in calligraphy, on recycled, artisanal paper.
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Testimonials