My cat is watching me, and I am a prisoner of my own home office. I'm not lazy, I'm just conserving energy for when my cat demands snacks.
Excuse 1: My cat needs me to be on call 24/7. It's not me, it's the cat.
Excuse 2: My cat has been trained in the art of ninjutsu and I don't want to be its next target.
Excuse 3: My cat has a Ph.D. in psychology and it's doing its dissertation on human productivity.
My Cat's Not That Clever, really.
My Cat Is My Manager, and I'm just following orders.
Newsflash: My cat's ninja skills are overrated. It can't even catch a laser pointer.
Excuse 4: My cat is secretly a time traveler from ancient Egypt, and it's just observing my progress.
Excuse 5: My cat has a Ph.D. in physics and it's working on a top-secret project to create a cat-sized black hole.
I've been promoted to CEO of Cat-soft Corporation, a company that specializes in catnip and cat food. My cat is my sole investor.
Excuse 6: My cat has a team of highly skilled accountants and lawyers on speed dial, and we're going after my previous employer for catnip-related damages.
Excuse 7: My cat has a direct line to the cat overlords of the internet, and they're funding our startup with an endless supply of cat treats.